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Paying the Piper

Through an exhaustive effort, this blogger was able to track down Piper, the famous Findlay cat caught in a drainage pipe this month at Donnell Middle School.

The cat’s plight created a media firestorm. This is an exclusive interview.

So how are you feeling today, Piper?

My name is actually Orange. I don’t know why the liberal media picked Piper. But I’m fine considering my age.

And what is your age?

Next question.

You sound bitter.

Well, you spend a couple days in a drainpipe and have a TV camera shoved in your face. See how you’d like that!

How did you get stuck?

Some friends and I had been out at downtown bars. Later, we sort of bet who could get in and out of that pipe. I lost. They left.

Must be embarrassing.

You think?

It all turned out well. What will you do with the money donated to you?

Probably buy some new friends to hang out with. And lots of catnip Lots.

What finally convinced you to get out of the drainpipe?

I heard a school official threatening to play Miley Cyrus music. Something about a wrecking ball.

Anything else to add?

Get that camera away from me.

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